Our Swine Flu Tank

Preparing for the end of mankind is important, after all there are now three, yes three, new cases of swine flu in the UK and as I type this post there may now be three and a half. At this alarming rate of progression we'll be lucky to make it to the weekend which would be a real bummer, because I still have to find out what the other four Pussycat Dolls do. Are they singers? Are they just backing dancers? What are their names? They mesmerise and confuse me.

Never ones to rest on our laurels the HMS Friday crew have made all the necessary precautions to avoid infection from the swine flu by purchasing one of these bad boys online. The JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank is a snip at just under $20,000, has a top speed of 40mph and can carry up to five non-infected persons.

When the pandemic wipes out the majority of mankind we'll be slowly rolling through the deserted streets in our Badonkadonk with the HMS Friday flag flying high, if you see us just raise your infected withered arm and wave but don't bother to try and hitch a lift, we'll have chainsaws.